Self-Compassion
By Anne-Marie Bailey
My suggested theme for September is ‘self-compassion’. In September it becomes clear that the last remnants of Summer are over and we tend to get busy for a variety of reasons. Sometimes we take on too much and can spread ourselves too thinly. This can lead to our Yoga practice taking a back seat, being last on the list – or even worse – not making it onto the list in the first place! Instead, we can gently remind ourselves that by relaxing and recharging during yoga practice, we are practicing self-care. Self-care is far from selfish. Directing kindness and concern to ourselves – through our thoughts, words and actions – benefits us and all those around us.
Some say that the most important words we ever say are the words that we say to ourselves. We can pause for a moment, just before we begin to practice, to reflect back on our day and bring to mind the things that we’ve silently said to ourself in our mind. Maybe we told ourself off for forgetting to do something. Maybe we looked in the mirror and used harsh words to ourself about our appearance. Maybe we convinced ourself that we wouldn’t be able to achieve something. We can take a moment to recall the words we’ve used to ourself. Now, I would guess that what we sometimes say to ourself and the way that we say it, in no way reflects how we would talk to anyone else. We don’t talk to others the same way that we talk to ourselves because we don’t want to hurt them. In yoga we have the word ‘Ahimsa’ which can be translated to ‘nonharming’. Ahimsa is at the very heart of yoga practice. For September, during our yoga practice, I’m gently suggesting that we try to be more compassionate to ourself. If for example, we raise your left arm instead of our right – we don’t need tell ourself off; if we can’t balance as well as we did last week – we don’t need to convice yourself that we’ll never be able to do it – we can try to not be self-critical. Instead, we can do our best to show the love and kindness to ourself that we give all day to others.
Before practice – standing, sitting or lying
For each yoga practice this month, we can begin by setting a self-compassionate intention (Sankalpa) eg ‘I deserve this time on my mat to rest and recharge’, ‘I make time to practice Yoga without any feelings of guilt’.
During asana
• Move with love
• As we enter a pose, we can try to do so with kindness – accepting any limitations that we may have
• Become aware of the community of support around us in class
During rests within the asanas
As we rest, we can connect to our heart centre, compassion can be thought of as tenderness of the heart – we can direct some of this tenderness towards ourself, we deserve it. If it helps, we can place one hand on our heart to help us to connect with the sensations in this area.
At the end of class/waking up after relaxation
Instead of jumping up and rushing to do the next job/activity/errand, we can pause for a moment after Savasana and consider all the ways that our body has moved for us during our practice, all the ways it has moved throughout our day, how our legs have carried us, how hard our hands have worked. Then we can send healing love from our heart centre to every area of our body.
Affirmation
‘I love and accept myself – just the as I am’.
Reference:
Self Compassion, the proven power of being kind to yourself, Kristin Neff PhD
Photo taken by myself Sept 2024